Pvt. Pinko's Parade Of Parody


The Beatles-The Hate Album

 beatles3 

You’ve heard of the popular LOVE album by the Beatles, a collection of remixed Beatles songs.

Now comes HATE, an album of bold re-interpretations from the Beatles catalogue as envisioned by despots & scoundrels from the last 100 years!

Now don’t get offended…after all, this is a PARODY!

 

beatles4

 

Track 1
Dick Cheney
Can’t Dry Me Off

As sung to “Can’t Buy Me Love”

I’ll find a terrorist ring, my friends,
As long as i break some rights
The means justify the ends,
I think waterboarding’s right
Cause I don’t care too much for justice,
And justice can’t dry me off

I’ll go on tv shows with lies,
Say you’ll turn the other cheek
I may not have a leg to stand on
But i think your stomach’s weak
Cause I don’t care too much for justice,
And justice can’t dry me off

Can’t dry me off, my lawyers tell me so
Can’t dry me off, no no no, no

Say Bush busted a terrorist ring
And you’ll be satisfied
Tell me that you want the kind of things
That torture magnifies
Cause I don’t care too much for justice,
And justice can’t dry me off
Now say: Owww

Can’t dry me off, pundits will tell you so
Can’t dry me off, no no no, no

————

Track 2
George W. Bush
With A Little Help From Dad’s Friends

As sung to “With A Little Help From My Friends”

What would you think if I sang like a bird
Would you stand up and rush to kill me?
Lend me your ears and I’ll tell you what wrongs
I’ve done & you could just let me be
Oh, I got by with a little help from Dad’s friends
I got high while the world was run by Dad’s friends,
Oh I’m gonna fry with a little help from Dad’s friends

What do I do when Cheney’s away?
(How do you function when you’re all alone?)
How do I feel by the end of the day?
(Likely smirking to yourself on your throne)
No, I got by with a little help from Dad’s friends
Mmm, I got high while the world was run by Dad’s friends
Mmm, I’m gonna fry with a little help from Dad’s friends

(Do you care about anybody?)
Hey, I just want to be loved
(Could you explain this dead body?)
Hey, that idea was Karl Rove’s

Would you believe that I’m just not that bright?
(Yes, we’re certain you were dropped as a child)
Would you forgive a fool who thought he was right?
(Let’s ask the million Iraqis who have died)
No, I got by with a little help from Dad’s friends,
Mmm, I got high while the world was run by Dad’s friends
Mmm, I’m gonna fry with a little help from Dad’s friends

(Do you care about anybody?)
Hey, when push comes to shove
(Did you keep Saddam’s body?)
Hey, that idea was Karl Rove’s

Oh…
I get by with a little help from Dad’s friends
I’ve gotten snide with a little help from Dad’s friends
I get high with a little help from Dad’s friends
Yes, I get by with a little help from Dad’s friends
With a little help from Dad’s friends

————

Track 3
Osama bin Laden
I Am The Terrorist

As sung to “I Am The Walrus”

I am he as you are he
As you are me and we are al-Qaeda
See how they run like pigs from a dump
See my planes fly
I’m smiling

Sitting in a cave
Waiting for the war to come
World Trade Center is hit
What a bloody tuesday
Bush, you’ve been a naughty boy
You let your nation down
I am the bad man
They are the bad men
I am the terrorist
Boom boom g’joob

Mister US president setting
Pretty little soldiers in a row
See how they die like their God in the sky
See how they run
I’m smiling
I’m smiling
I’m smiling
I’m smiling

Yellowcake bullshit
Dripping sarcasm from Bush’s evil eyes
Imperialist midwife
CNN graphics the violent West
New York, you’ve been a naughty girl
Had to knock some buildings down
I am the bad man
They are the bad men
I am the terrorist
Boom boom g’joob

————

Track 4
Josef Stalin
Here Comes The Scum

As sung to “Here Comes The Sun”

Here comes the scum
Here comes the scum
And I say “it’s a fight”

Little Germans
Welcome to our long cold deadly winters
Little Germans
It feels good to see them come in fear
Here comes the scum
Here comes the scum
And I say “come & fight”

Little Germans
Their souls have turned to feces
Little Germans
It’s a shame since i loved their beer
Here comes the scum
Here comes the scum
And I say “come & fight”

Scum, scum, scum, here they come…
Scum, scum, scum, here they come…
Scum, scum, scum, here they come…
Scum, scum, scum, here they come…
Scum, scum, scum, here they come…

Little Germans
I feel their side slowly losing
Little Germans
It seems like i could flank their rear
Here comes the scum
Here comes the scum
And I say “Stalingrad!”

————

Track 5
Chairman Mao Zedong
Red Revolution

As sung to “Revolution”

You say you want Red Revolution
Well, you know
We all want to change the world
You tell me that it’s a convolution
Well, you know
I want to help poor boys & girls
But when you talk about instruction
It’s all here in my little Red Book
What you don’t know is it’s gonna be
Far right
Far right
Far right

You say you need a real solution
Well, you know
Just wait till you see my plan
You ask me if it’s redistribution
Well, you know
We’re gonna be taking lots of land
But when you want money for People
Instead of the State
All I can tell you, brother
Is you’ll have to wait
Don’t you know it’s gonna be
Far right
Far right
Far right

Ah, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha…

You say that it’s against intuition
Well, you know
We all want to make it Red
You tell me it’s the wrong institution
Well, you know
You better mind what Karl Marx said
Now let me introduce myself
I’m Chairman Mao
And you ain’t going to make it
With capitalism anyhow
Don’t you know it’s gonna be
Far right
Far right
Far right
Far right

————

Track 6
Robert Shelton
(Imperial Wizard of the KKK)
Get Back (To Africa)

As sung to “Get Back”

Jojo was a Negro who woke to something burning
The cross would not be his last
Jojo had a home in Jackson, Alabama
Where white folk hated his black ass
Get back, get back
Get back to where you once belonged
Get back, get back
Get back to where you once belonged
Get back JoJo
Go home
Get back, get back
Back or we’ll get you hung
Get back, get back
To Africa, from where you was brung
Get back Jo!

Sweet Loretta Martin thought she was a human
Sat at the counter of a coffee stand
When she was beaten, cops said she had it coming
Dixie ain’t no place for the coloured man
Get back, get back
Get back to where you once belonged
Get back, get back
Get back to where you once belonged
Get back Loretta
Go home
Get back, get back
Back or we’ll get you hung
Get back, get back
To Africa, from where you was brung
Get back Loretta
Good ol’ boys waiting for you
Wearing their pointed hoods
Gonna tie you to their pickup
Get on home Loretta
Get back, get back
Get back to where you once belonged

————

Track 7
Adolf Hitler
I Want To Take Your Land

As sung to “I Want To Hold Your Hand”

Oh yeah
I’ll tell you something
I think you’ll understand
When I take a little something
It’s gonna be your land
I wanna take your land
I wanna take your land

Oh, please
Say to me
You’ll be like Chamberlain
And please, say to me
You’ll let me take your land
Now let me take your land
I wanna take your land

And when I take it
I’ll feel happy, and snide
It’s such a feeling
When my troops
Blitz inside
Blitz inside
Blitz inside

Yeah you
Got that something
I think you’ll understand
When I take that little something
It’s gonna be your land
I wanna take your land
I wanna take your land

And when I tell you
I’ll leave Poland, i lied
I’m used to double dealing
Then my troops
Blitz inside
Blitz inside
Blitz inside

Yeah you
Got that something
I think you´ll understand
When I want a certain something
It’s gonna be your land
I wanna take your land
I wanna take your land

————

Track 8
Benito Mussolini
The Ballad Of Adolf & Benito

As sung to “The Ballad Of John & Yoko”

Standing at a dock in Tunisia
Trying to get word from Hitler on France
Rommel came back said,
“We’ve got to pull back
You know the Allies won`t give us a chance!”

Christ, you know it ain’t easy
You know how hard it can be
The way things are going
They’re gonna really hang me

In Italy, i’m taken prisoner
Armistice made not in my name
Then I catch a break,
Hitler’s men helped me escape
To Switzerland, from there I’ll fly to Spain

Christ, you know it ain’t easy
You know how hard it can be
The way things are going
They’re gonna really hang me

I think back to the East Prussian Hilton
Where Hitler brought me in for a speak
The Fuhrer then said,
“Fascism ain’t dead!
Man, we’re only trying to bring ’em some peace!”

Christ, you know it ain’t easy
You know how hard it can be
The way things are going
They’re gonna really hang me

Hitler shouldn’t have opened up the Eastern Front
Given the Russians’ ferocity
Last night the mistress said,
“Oh boy, when you’re dead
No one will remember you
But for the trains – think!

Allies like lightning through the continent
Hitler says that Europe’s in the bag
The newspaper said,
“Berlin will fall to the Reds
And Il Duce will have his feet dragged”

Christ, you know it ain’t easy
You know how hard it can be
The way things are going
They’re gonna really hang me

Hitler said take a plane back to Roma
Fifty guns now aimed at my back
The men from the press
Said, “Where’s the success?
The Allies beat you both blue & black!”

Christ, you know it ain’t easy
You know how hard it can be
The way things are going
They’re gonna really hang me
The way things are going
They’re gonna really hang me

————

Track 9
Pol Pot
The Killing Fields Forever

As sung to “Strawberry Fields Forever”

No one I think wants to be a Maoist
Maybe in Nam or in Laos
You’re gonna learn to be peasant
In Cambodia, all right
And if you die, well that’s too bad

Let me beat you down
Cause I’m turning it to
The Killing Fields
Not a big deal
Just bodies all strewn about
The Killing Fields forever

Killing is easy with the worlds’ eyes closed
I’ll slaughter your whole family while you sleep
It’s getting hard to trust someone
But it all works out
Things don’t matter much, you’ll see

Let me beat you down
Cause I’m turning it to
The Killing Fields
Not a big deal
Just lots of holes that are dug out
The Killing Fields forever

Always know sometimes think it’s weird
But you know I love it when they scream
You think we’re joking but
The Khmer Rouge are never wrong
Just get down on your knees

Let me beat you down
Cause I’m turning it to
The Killing Fields
Not a big deal
But when the Angkar starts to doubt
The Killing Fields forever
The Killing Fields forever
The Killing Fields forever
The Killing Fields forever

————

Track 10
Kim Jong Ill
All You Need Is Love (For Dear Leader)

As sung to “All You Need Is Love”

Love, love, love…
Love, love, love…
Love, love, love…

There’s nothing you can do if we say it can`t be done
Nothing you can sing if we say it can`t be sung
Nothing you can say but you can learn how to love the State
It’s easy

Nothing you can make without Consent Form 40A
No one you can talk to unless it can be videotaped
Nothing you can do but you can learn how to drill in time
It’s easy

All you need is love… (for Dear Leader)
All you need is love… (for Dear Leader)
All you need is love, love…
Don`t make us break your knees

All you need is love… (for Dear Leader)
All you need is love… (for Dear Leader)
All you need is love, love…
Don`t make us break your knees

Nothing you can know because it`s better unknown
Nothing you can see, we`d rather it not be shown
Nowhere you can be that isn’t where you’re allowed to be
It’s easy

All you need is love… (for Dear Leader)
All you need is love… (for Dear Leader)
All you need is love, love…
Don`t make us break your knees

All you need is love… (all together now!)
All you need is love… (everybody!)
All you need is love, love…
Don`t make us break your knees
Don`t make us break your knees
Don`t make us break your knees

Oh yeah!
He loves you, yeah yeah yeah
He loves you, yeah yeah yeah

————

Track 11
Heinrich Muller
(Chief of the Gestapo 1939-1945)
Nazis In The Reich With Diamonds

As sung to “Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds”

Picture yourself in a bank in a city
With Gestapo guards and two SS spies
Somebody calls you
You motion quite slowly to
A frau with a gem scope in her eyes

Such insane treasures
Of gold and of green
Towering over your head
The look on the frau
With a gun in her eyes
Now she’s gone

Nazis in the Reich with diamonds
Nazis in the Reich with diamonds
Nazis in the Reich with diamonds
Ah… Ah…

Follow Hitler down
Or make your way to the mountain
Where all the local people
Eat Messerschmitt lead
Everyone dies as you
Live past the bombers
That fly so incredibly high

A seaplane taxis and
Appears on the shore
Waiting to take you away
Climb in the back
With your head in the clouds
And you’re gone

Nazis in the Reich with diamonds
Nazis in the Reich with diamonds
Nazis in the Reich with diamonds
Ah… Ah…

Picture yourself
On a train in a station
With Florida porters
Never once getting wise
Suddenly Prescott Bush
Is there at the turnstile

Nazis in the Reich with diamonds
Nazis in the Reich with diamonds
Nazis in the Reich with diamonds
Ah… Ah…

————

Track 12
General Hideki Tojo
(Japanese Command)
Bomb Me Do

As sung to “Love Me Do”

Bomb, bomb me do
You know I`d love to
Between me and you
My fleet…
Bomb me do
Whoa
Bomb me do

Bomb, bomb me do
These plans that I drew
Pearl Harbour…ka-boom!
Their fleet…
Bomb me do
Whoa
Bomb me do

America to bomb
America, it`s true
America to bomb
America, ka-blew!

Bomb, bomb me do
Hawaii Op, phase 2
Between me and you
My fleet…
Bomb me do
Whoa
Bomb me do

————

Track 13
Richard Nixon
Pres. Nixon`s Deadly Farts Club Band

As sung to “Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band”

It was forty years ago today
Richard Nixon brought the world to flames
He’s been going in and out of style
But he’s guaranteed to get us riled
So may I introduce to you
The man you’ve hated all these years
Pres. Nixon`s Deadly Farts Club Band

We’re Pres. Nixon’s Deadly Farts Club Band
We hope he won’t napalm the show
We’re Pres. Nixon’s Deadly Farts Club Band
Sit back and let the liberals go…
Pres. Nixon’s Deadly
Pres. Nixon’s Deadly
Pres. Nixon’s Deadly Farts Club Band

It’s wonderful to be here
Henry Kissinger is a pill
Robert McNamara is in the audience
We’d like to take you in with us
Let`s put those handcuffs on

He never really wanted to stop the war
Thought nothing of the massacre at My Lai
Now the president’s going to sing a song
And he says that he was never wrong
So let me introduce to you
The one and only Tricky Dick
And Pres. Nixon’s Deadly Farts Club Band

————

Track 14
Rush Limbaugh
Magical History Revisionist Tour

As sung to “Magical Mystery Tour”

Tune in, tune in for the history tour
Tune in, tune in for the history tour
Tune in (AND THAT’S AN INVITATION)
Tune in for the history tour
Tune in (WE’RE ALL ABOUT REPETITION)
Tune in for the history tour

The Magical Mystery Revisionist Tour
Says Obama will take your guns away
Wants to take your AK

Tune in, tune in for the history tour
Tune in, tune in for the history tour
Tune in (WE’VE GOT THE FACTS YOU NEED)
Tune in for the history tour
Tune in (OUR LISTENERS ARE ALL ON SPEED)
Tune in for the history tour

The Magical Mystery Revisionist Tour
Says Obama hopes to make you all gay
Hopes to give abortions away

Tune in, tune in for the history tour
Tune in, tune in for the history tour
Tune in (IT’S ANOTHER HATEFUL EDITION)
Tune in for the history tour
Tune in (BRING YOUR OXYCONTIN PRESCRIPTION)
Tune in for the history tour

The Magical Mystery Revisionist Tour
Says Obama’s destroying the USA
Will surrender to al-Qaeda today

————

DISCLAIMER: With immense hesitation, ethical turmoil, creative conflict & even going so far as to ask people`s honest opinions, I post this final parody with the caveat that (a) i know i`m going to Hell, (b) i fully appreciate the gravity & horror of the subject & have long studied the Holocaust in a grave attempt to understand it, and (c) this is an attempt at inspiring inappropriate laughter from a clever twist – it is by no means, whatsoever & in any possible, conceivable sense, meant to injure, offend, undignify or dishonour the Jewish people, with whom I bear no ill will or animosity, irregardless of past criticisms on the government of Israel itself. Thank you.

————

Track 15
Adolf Hitler
Hey Jew

As sung to “Hey Jude”

Hey Jew
I’m not so bad
I take a mad world and make it better
Remember
To get into the cart
Then we can start
To make Germany better

Hey Jew
Don’t be afraid
You were made to throw out into ghettos
The minute they let ol’ Hitler swagger in
Then we begin
To make the Reich better

And anytime you feel the pain
Hey Jew
Refrain
Don’t worry we’ll relieve you of growing older
For well you know you could be gay
It’s cruel
We’re making this world a little bolder

Hey Jew
Don’t let me down
We have found you
Now go and get in
Remember
To just play your part
Then we can start
To make Germany better

So get on out and get on in
Hey Jew
Begin
We’re waiting for someone to scapegoat
And don’t you know that it’s just you
Hey Jew
You’ll do
The blame of the world is on your shoulder

Hey Jew
It’s not so bad
It’s just shit luck
Now don’t get bitter
Remember
When the Zyklon B hits your skin
Hitler will begin
To make it
Better better better better better better
Oh…

Na na na na na na
Na na na
Hey Jew…

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